Daily Archives: August 9, 2015

I have cancer

March of 2013 I found a lump in my right breast. I did nothing until May. I saw a doctor and refused conventional treatment, choosing to just try to eat better. Well eating healthier until October 2014. That December I began to have pain in my lower back and hips. We thought it was sciatica and figured it would go away on its own. Boy were we wrong.

In May 2015 my husband, Ed and I began to go to the beach every weekend. I noticed that I was losing mobility each week.

May 27, 2015 began this most difficult time. I went to pick up something off the floor and got stuck. I could not move. My daughter had to call my husband home from work to help me. I was in intense pain and could hardly move. My son, Jonathan, came over to drive me to his chiropractor while Ed drove our daughter, Amanda, to work.

I felt some improvement after he did some decompression on three disks that were bulging in my lower back which he saw on the xrays. When things did not improve, he ordered an MRI on June 10th. They called my husband on the next morning to tell him that I had a mass on my back pushing on the spine, that my breast cancer had metastasized and I needed to get to my doctor ASAP.

Ed did not call, he just came home. I was in the kitchen and heard him walk in the door. My heart froze, immediately thinking he lost his job. His face, I can not describe the look in his eyes when he came into the kitchen. He told me the doctor called him and told him I needed to get to my doctor ASAP that I had cancer that has spread. Whew, is that all, what a relief. Then it began to sink in. This was me we were talking about. I have cancer. My son came home from work, so did his wife, Genée – she gave her ticket away to Tampa Bay Rays game for that night. Now having them all here made me feel like a lab specimen. I mean, I am Mom, I take care of others, not the one needing care. Thus began our journey into that scary medical realm.

June 12th we saw my primary doctor. Oh boy. What a jolt to my life. They instantly began to order a barrage of tests, set up appointments with the oncologist, surgeon, and radiologist. My head was spinning. I was numb but going through the motions with the help and support of my family.  Jonathan called an old friend, Carla Gilmore (CNM CNC HC) she is a Nutritional Microscopist, Counselor and Health Coach since 1998. She walked through cancer herself and has since helped others to do the same.

During this time I was screaming inside. I did not want radiation or chemo or surgery. I had seen what that did to my Dad and other friends. I agreed to go to my next two appointments but I knew what I wanted. Naturally the doctors began with prescriptions, one for pain, one for nausea (which I did not have) and one for anxiety. I tried the pain meds, I mean, I could hardly walk or sit or stand. Well that did not work out for me. It magnified the pain. I disliked the oncologist. He was good, but cold and unfeeling. His office was a like a morgue. He ordered a PET scan and a bone scan. Both use nuclear dyes. Ed and I prayed about what to do, but it ended up with us having to cancel both because we have such a high deductible and would have had to pay for them both up front.

Breathe. My first appointment with Carla was that same afternoon, June 15th. I am thankful my son called her. After all that doom and gloom talk, she gave me hope. She began my healing protocol. Actually, she began a protocol that would boost my immune system so my body could do what God designed it to do, Heal Itself!

We did see the surgeon on June 18th and liked him, but but but…he said I needed to have my breast removed now and he could not do it because our insurance would not cover the hospital he works out of. Mind you, my oncologist said they would not do surgery because it was too far spread. He just wanted a biopsy done. This is nuts. They can not agree on things and the stress had me a wreck.

We went home and I said enough. Not doing this. That was my last dealing with conventional cancer treatment and doctors.

Before I get too far ahead of myself…we are so grateful to Ed’s bosses. They have been amazingly supportive and helpful allowing Ed to work from home so he can be here to take care of me during the time I could do nothing for myself.

Day by day…step by step…

Categories: cancer, family | Tags: , , , , | 5 Comments

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